Chinese Missile Was Originally Destined For Palmy

In not much of a shock to the nation and the world that the missile launched over the Pacific Ocean today by China was actually supposed to exterminate the city of Palmerston North. Inside sources from the Chinese Communist Party told the PN Herald that the mission had a technical failure and was aborted. The event was later reported to be a "test launch".

Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters has since toned down his anger at China and now seeks to help them remedy this unexpected challenge.

"We are organising 33 different slect committees and allocating 7% of our GDP to explore the possibilities of putting a large target over the city" - Winston Peters

Palmerston North Mayor Grant Smith is said to have disappeared to Argentina to reunite with Michael Jackson and a certain man who "died in 1945"

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